December 21, 2018

Twas the Workout Before Christmas

THE SCENE: Cold. Drizzly. The faint smell of Speedy’s gloves filled the AO.

PAX were welcomed and disclaimed.


  • Side Straddle Hop IC x 20
  • Forward Arm Circles IC x 15
  • Reverse Arm Circles IC x 15
  • Imperial Walkers IC x 20
  • Mosey


10 OYO Burpees

Q read the following rendition of Twas the Night Before Christmas. PAX conducted workouts when exercises were mentioned in the poem. Exercises performed are in bold. PAX planked whenever the poem was being read and they were not performing another exercise.

Twas the weekend before Christmas, when all through the AO

Not a PAX was stirring, not even C-LO.

The burpees were finished in the parking lot with care

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be here

The PAX were planking all cold on the ground

While visions of 20 monkey humpers danced all around

And Speedy with his stinky gloves, and Boba Fett in his cap

Had just settled down with the PAX to do 20 plank jacks.

When out on the grass, there rose such a clatter

The PAX sprang from their plank to see what was the matter.

Away to the library books we flew like a flash

Sprinting vigorously, we completed the dash.

The concrete at the feet of the of winded PAX

Gave the luster of 20 in cadence smurf jacks

When, what to our wondering eyes should appear,

But Grimace and 8 tiny exercises so near.

A little old Q, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment, this must be a trick.

More rapid than eagles his courses they came,

And he whistled and shouted and called them by name.

Now Big Boy Situps (ICx10), now Mountain Climbers (ICx10), now Squats (ICx10), now 10 OYO Burpees

On Merkins (ICx10), on Side Straddle Hops (ICx10), on Lunges (ICx10), on Randys (ICx20)

To the top of the playground, to the top of the wall

Now dash away, dash away, dash away all! (sprint to playground)

So up to the pavilion the PAX they flew

With a sleigh full of toys and Grimace, too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the ground

The sound of feet as more mountain climbers (ICx10) came ‘round.

As we drew in our hand, and did 10 pickle pounds

Down the slide Grimace came with a bound

He was dressed all in red, from his head to his foot,

His clothes were all tarnished, in sweat and dirt.

A bundle of toys, he had brought on his back

He looked like a peddler just opening his pack.

His eyes, how they twinkled, his dimples how merry.

His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry.

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow

And the beard of his chin was gone, oh no!

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth

And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath

He had a broad face and a little round belly

That shook when he laughed like a bowlful of jelly.

He was lean and mean, a right jolly old creature

And everyone laughed when they saw him,

he had the weirdest of features.

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head

Soon let me know, we had nothing to Dredd.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to work.

Laying out presents, then he turned with a jerk.

And laying a finger on his nose,

Giving a nod, up the slide he rose.

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle

But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight


After completion of the poem, PAX played Dirty Santa/White Elephant. Once the present in the center was touched, it belonged to that PAX. Unfortunately, no PAX stole from anyone else, but all selected from the center. Once each PAX had their present, we read aloud what each exercise was to the group, and then performed each exercise. Presents and exercises were:

  • 50 Side Bends per side (hold bag at your side with straight arm, and use obliques to lift.
  • 125 Calf raises on a small piece of wood
  • 100 arm circles with 5 pound weights
  • 60 big boy situps with a SOYpond
  • 75 over head press with CMU

After PAX completed their exercise, 3 presents remained. The first present was a ruler. In the plank position, PAX held their hands 12 inches apart and performed 10 or 5 Merkins at the discretion of the Q. After each set of 10 or 5, PAX would move their hands in one inch until thumbs were touching in the center (Ranger Merkin). 45 Merkins total.

The penultimate present was a tire that each PAX threw over their head and over a swing set. We did this twice.

The last present was a basketball. We broke off into 4 teams. Each team took a side of the funnel ball goal (google funnel ball if you don’t know what it is). One PAX would shoot. If the ball came out their side, they got a point. Everyone else had to do 5 squats. First to 5 points wins. The penalty for missed shots was 10 squats for everyone. Rabbit and Boba Fett won with 5 points, followed by Grimace with 3, Speedy with 2, and Photoshop with 1 point.

No MARY, but core was worked throughout.
5 PAX (0 FNGS) Speedy, Photoshop, Rabbit, Boba Fett, Grimace
Stolen from Lipton’s Sunday sermon, we talked about kids having to wait for Christmas, and the excitement that builds up, waking up in the middle of the night in anticipation of Christmas.

Similarly, we talked about Mary and Joseph, as they were waiting for the baby to be born and for a place to stay.

We looked at Isaiah 40:31 – “But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary. They shall walk and not faint.”


Will definitely have to do the Funnelball/Basketball game again.

Annex will be closed Tuesday December 25th in recognition of Christmas.