February 28, 2018

Riding in Nora’s Beamer

AO: The Levee (was not dry)

THE SCENE: It was rainy and 64.3°. It was also wet. Like disappointingly wet. Water standing everywhere. Like almost as if the City of Germantown didn’t even attempt to dry off the Levee for us. Absolute waste of tax dollars.

F3 WELCOME & DISCLAIMER: Yada, yada, yada.

SSH IC x 15
Hillbillies IC x 15
Arm Circles IC x 10 (and reverse)
Mountain Climber Merkins IC x 10

*We paused for 10 seconds, thinking Meter Maid would come flying into the  parking lot, exercising his spiritual gift of always arriving at the conclusion of Warm-o-Rama (he despises SSH), but he never showed. So we proceeded … 

THA THANG: We partnered up and got to know Nora, Dora’s pretentious younger sister who lives in the ‘burbs and drives a BMW she earned from peddling made-up health and wellness products for her pyramid scheme being the top salesman in her multilevel marketing business.

Body Builders x 100
– Partner 1 begins exercise while Partner 2 bear crawls to first light pole, then sprints back to flapjack. Set was complete at 100 combined Body Builders.
– Halfway through this first set, the QIC called a Mercy Modification and changed the bear crawls to lunge walks.

Merkins x 200
– Partner 1 begins exercise while Partner 2 side shuffles to first light pole and back, then flapjacks. Set was complete at 200 combined Merkins.
– We learned our FNG, now named Harry Caray, is a #MerkinMachine.

World War I Sit-Ups x 300
– Partner 1 begins exercise while Partner 2 side shuffles to first light pole and back, then flapjacks. Set was complete at 300 combined sit-ups.
– Most of the PAX relocated their WW1 Sit-Up positions to the spongy softness of the Levee grass. But two PAX, Slicnut and Cowbell, laughed in the face of comfort and welcomed the coccyx rash like a long-lost friend.

TRIP DOWN MEMORY LANE: It’s been weeks, nay months, since we’ve utilized the skate park during BC. So we moseyed over for old time’s sake.

1.  Bear Balls to the Wall
2. Reverse Bear Balls to the Wall
3. Box Jumps x 25

Nolan Ryans IC x 10 on each side
Evil Lance Armstrongs IC x 15 on each side

7 PAX got to know Nora (and will be contacted later because she has an “exciting opportunity for them”): Slicnut, Snowman, Moneybags, Cowbell, Bombay, Harry Caray (FNG), Captain Obvious (QIC)

CIRCLE OF TRUST/BOM: YHC shared a portion of this week’s Q Source:

The quality of a man’s relationship with his children them defines the quality of their relationships with everyone else for the rest of their lives. If he is absent, they will be distrustful. If he is capricious, they will be unjust. If he is cold, they will be withdrawn. But, if he is present, just and warm the HIM will have imprinted upon his children’s hearts a template of relational success upon which they can rely throughout their lives. They will in turn pass it on to their Shorties. In this way, the IMPACT is infinite.

Nora, like her sisters, is not a friend you enjoy being around. However, the PAX gutted it out and destroyed several patches of grass (sorry Germantown Parks & Rec department!). After Name-o-Rama, our FNG committed the cardinal sin of attempting to name himself “Cyclops” because, as a member of the Airborne Infantry, he lost an eye while on tour in Iraq. We thanked him for his service and shared that his preferred name would be way too cool, therefore it would not be accepted. His F3 name was then bestowed upon him due to the proclamation of his love for the Chicago White Sox.

Nada. Literally nothing. We could not have announced less (Sorry, Bruce. We should’ve plugged the Service Opportunity, but most of us are older and have failing memories).