June 15, 2018

Dora Moseys to Millington

Date: 06/14/2018
AO: The Cockpit
QIC: Soybean
PAX: No Fuego, Choker, Soulja Boy, Short Timer, Zima, Tree Hugger, Leaky, Orange Julius, Bombay, Soybean | FNGs: Shania, Rickover, Hilltopper

THE SCENE: At YHC’s humble abode, it was dark. Then I drove for 30 minutes, and it was less dark. The Cockpit in Millington, TN is our newest AO, and YHC had the privilege of leading our second workout there. Upon arrival, I moseyed around a little to inspect the premises, taking special note of the two bridges (one wider, sturdier than the other) and the meadow, which was pleasantly damp. 

75* is gross, but I guess it could be worse.

F3 WELCOME & DISCLAIMER
Did that.

WARM-O-RAMA:
SSH x20
IW x15
Daisy Picker x10
Hillbilly x15
Short lil Indian Run around the 0.5 mile walking track, sprint to tennis courts. Thinking about calling this a Curry Lap in the future.

THA-THANG:
Dora 1-2-3
For a new AO with new(ish) PAX, YHC decided to introduce them to Dora 1-2-3, a classic and adaptable routine that’s great for men of all fitness levels. PAX partnered up. P1 made a box inside the tennis court, side shuffle, run forward, side shuffle, run backwards. P2 started on the exercises. 

100 Merkins
200 Big Boy Sit-ups
300 Squats

Teams who finished early did flutter kicks and planks, then we all jumped in on the last 100 or so squats for the teams that were behind. 

Next, we moseyed across the big bridge to the field. Zima was shouting something like “Oh no, not the Dutchies” as we approached the bridge. Then he sounded relieved when I kept going. I don’t know what that was about, but I’m glad I spared him.

Burpee Catch-Me-If-You-Can:
Same partners. P1 takes off backwards across the field. P2 does 3 burpees and runs to catch P1. Flapjack to the far backstop, ~100 yards. Bombay got assaulted by a horsefly while we waited for the six. Repeato back to the start point. 

Something blue appeared in my peripheral vision. I looked over into a neighboring backyard. There was a man leaning on his above ground pool with his dog, just watching. I guess he’s never seen 13 grown men running around at 6am and looking miserable.

Moseyed across the tiny bridge with weak boards. YHC was legitimately concerned the bridge would give way with 1.5 tons on there at the same time. It didn’t, but this was Day 2. We’ll have to see how she holds up. 

MARY:
Hand-release merkin IC x10 (This is where you start in high plank, lower chest all the way to the ground on 1, raise hands out to side on 2, hands back in on 3, and back up to plank on 4.)
Slow count merkin IC x5
Hand-release merkin IC x10
Dying Cockroad IC x10
LBCs IC x8 to 0615

COUNT-OFF & NAME-O-RAMA
Did that. 13 PAX. Three (3) FNGs earned new names. 

CIRCLE OF TRUST/BOM:
YHC and M are foodies. Anthony Bourdain’s shows are some of my favorites. On the outside, he was wealthy, had a job everyone wants, and went places most of us can only dream about. He seemed happy. And yet, he despaired enough to take his own life. Depression, loneliness, and hopelessness are not always easily identifiable. YHC has wrestled with depression for years. The community of brothers I’ve found in F3 has been a great encouragement for me. There have been weeks when posting is the only thing I’ve looked forward to. All of us have men in our lives who need community, a band of brothers. Even if your neighbor/coworker/family member looks happy, successful, or in amazing shape, he still needs F3. ABH

MOLESKIN:
YHC loves a good Dora workout. It’s a great way for bat flippers and FNGs to both get in an honest day’s work. YHC played third wheel, which wasn’t as fun on the catch-me-if-you-cans. The Mary circuit was interesting. I was counting cadence, but there was only the occasional muffled rep count from the PAX. Mostly I just heard groaning and heavy breathing.

Hilltopper and Rickover were sponsored by Bombay! Shania was sponsored by Jasmine. Shout-out to Captain Obvious for this excerpt from his Annex backblast. I’ve modified it for my purposes.

Neckbrace Shania, who experienced F3 for the first time today, came because of an invitation from Cheesesteak Jasmine. Neckbrace Shania assumed that Cheesesteak Jasmine would join him at the Annex Cockpit (as Sponsors are apt to do), because he was told … and I quote … “I’ll see you in the Gloom.” whatever Jasmine said. However, Pastor Cheese Jasmine instead Fartsacked, leaving his FNG all alone. Empty promises. Classic clergy Trane employee move*. 

ANNOUNCEMENTS:
Friday night ruck – see Slack for deets
GrowRuck in September – see Slack for tails

*FNG is also a Trane employee, so whatever.