November 20, 2019

Advanced Dungeons and Derkins at Ye Olde Annex

THE SCENE:  The calm before a battle. Shorts weather if ye be a hairy lad.
F3 WELCOME & DISCLAIMER:  Given correctly.

15x SSH IC (I’m an idiot that was goaded into singing the count and it sounded like the last one before halt, so we finished the set)
20x Windmills IC
20x IW IC
Short mosey to the Battleground, the awning behind the community center. Turns out I can’t go 2 months without using dice in a workout (I got big plans for the next one…). So we’re doing Dungeons and Derkins. I, the Derkin Master, explained the fight the PAX were in for. We were fighting a Fire Dragon!

How do you beat a monster in dungeons and derkins? You do exercises of its name! Fire Drills and “Draggin'” a tire sled (thanks Grimace!) are the PAX attacks. Fire Drills start with chopping feet, then someone says “Fire!” and everyone hits the deck, rolls, left, does a merkin, rolls right, does another merkin and gets up and resumes chopping feet. In a rotating fashion, one PAX saddles up the tire sled, and takes off running on the small pavement loop at the awning. As they leave they shout “Fire!” and the remaining PAX do the rolls/merkins. When the sled-runner returns, they roll a 6-sided die, doing that amount of damage to the Fire Dragon. They then pass the sled harness to the nex PAX and so on. The Dragon dies after 150 points of damage are done. And the last two wrinkles are these:
1) After all PAX get their attack in, it’s the Dragon’s turn. The 12-sided Exercise Die I have is rolled and all PAX do what it says, then resume their turns.
2) The PAX have a magic power: Reroll one die. This ability is good for one use per morning.

Thoughts on the proceedings: Maybe…just maybe…I shouldn’t have grown men frantically shout “Fire!” while sounding exhausted at 6AM. People might get the wrong idea. I seem to remember there being a “Tommy Boy” Movie about a Fire at a Community Center.

Pictured: One of the better gifs available from Black Sheep.

The Dragon put up a decent fight, getting us all for 15 Jump lunges and later, 20 burpees (critical hit). PAX Showed some good hustle and used their rerolls wisely. Pulling that tire back up-hill was no joke though. Some chaotic evil fellow put a CMU in there.

Time was running low, and young Gomer, who started the fight sick and later bonked his head too hard (feel better bud!) was worried about the outcome. With two minutes to go, Choker and Billy Blanks ran the loop along side the sled-runner to add extra rolls to the fight, and sure enough, the dragon went down at 6:14AM! Victory!

MARY: She sounds nice. Maybe some day we’ll have her out there.
10 – Grimace, Gun Show, Gomer, Tremor, DHL, Billy Blanks, Choker, Shoestring, Speedy (AOQ), Roomba (QIC)
I have a hard time letting go of things and letting people do their job/tasks. On an out of town assignment, I was too busy to supervise my colleagues. I was put in a place where I really had to let go of things and let people do things theirselves and it was hard. I encouraged PAX to, when their time comes, let it go.

I am hella impressed that I had 3 Dads out there with 2.0’s under 4 months old. One not even a week old! Also, tire sleds suck. I’d been warming up to pre-BC tire pulling, but nevermind. Also, that is the last time I use Spotify Daily Mixes sight unseen for a workout. Steve Perry’s tender jams do not get the blood flowing. Queen on the other hand…
And as per the usual, these nerd Qs are low-key savage beatdowns, and the rules just fly out the window by the end and it’s total calvinball. This time I was expecting it, welcoming it, and even joining in. The rules facilitate the fun, then the fun outlives the rules. And this is why Memphis is the land of rules.
I get to sign the flag next time I post! Gun Show’s probably gonna take it home, so I need to think of something to write on there to annoy him. Taking suggestions on Slack.
Also, Turkey Trot 4 miler is Thanksgiving Morning. Come join Us!
F3, FiA, 2.0 Convergence on Dec 21st. Bring ya wife, bring ya kids, they exercising everyone.